Created for intimacy

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God created us for intimacy. He designed us with desire to be intimate and to have relationships with one another, most importantly Him. He designed us in such a way that it is innate to look for relationship, but that search can also cause us to go toward the wrong direction, if we do not know what we are searching for.

 

Many of us search for significance in our friends, marriage, and other relationship to validate who we are in our lives, but that search tends to leave a void within us that leaves us feeling empty and incomplete. What are we searching for? Who are we searching for? Why do we keep searching?

 

Countless times, you see people jumping from one relationship to another. Looking for love yet never finding it and going through the emotional rollercoaster of life. God did not design us for that, but we allow ourselves to go through it because we are still trying to create fullness and self-worth without him.

 

When we go from one relationship to another it only cause pain. God did not design us to go from one relationship to another. He created us to wait and to be patient for the right one. While we are waiting, He wants us to have a relationship and intimacy with him. As we do this, we begin to find fulfillment and satisfaction it Him. However, when we find ourselves searching outside of God for intimacy we never find it. We must focus on our relationship with the Lord, and when we do this, everything else will come. (In His timing of course.) We were created for intimacy and to be complete in that journey. But often we find ourselves searching and looking for something or someone to fill that void.

 

There is a saying I have heard many times in my church, “Fish needs water to survive, but water does not need fish to survive.” In other words, we need God to survive, but God does not need us. Let us be clear, God wants us and he loves us, but he does not thrive on us for His well-being. However, we as people need Him whether we realize it or not. God created us for intimacy. He designed us with the desire to be intimate with him. The reason we crave relationships and friendship is that deep down we desire to be intimate with our Creator.

 

It is sad to see many people try to fill their loneliness in their lives with people, and when there are people around them, they still feel lonely. It is sad to see how many believe that next boy or girl is going fulfill them, or believe that marriage is going to complete them. Then the next thing they find out is that they are still empty and incomplete. They left out an important ingredient. That ingredient is God.

 

In order to have any successful intimate relationship, we must learn how to have an intimate successful relationship with God.  Through this, we are able and ready to have true intimacy with others. God did design us to be intimate, but first we need to be intimate with Him. When we learn this, having intimacy in our lives with others becomes easier. It sets a standard for us on how we should be treated or how we treat others.

Forgiveness Always Brings Healing

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The other day I talked to my friend about forgiveness and she said, “it’s such a hard thing to do”. That can be so true. I had to learn to forgive others so I can feel liberated. Ironically, forgiveness is more for me than the person who hurt me. I have learned that when we forgive others, it set us free, and allows us to move forward in life and our walk with Christ. “Forgetting what is behind and pressing on toward what is ahead.” I truly believe that forgiveness, is the key that allows us to do this.

When we live in unforgiveness, it causes us to become bitter, angry, filled with hate, and many of us begin to live with a victim’s mentality. In addition, it brings a separation between us and God. Without forgiving we alienate ourselves from Him.

Growing up, I had to learn how to forgive. My stepfather was an evil man. He caused me so much anguish and despair. It was unspeakable the way he abused me mentally, physically, and emotionally. Not only that, I had to learn how to forgive my mom as well, for allowing these things to happen me. (Years later, I find out she never understood and knew what was going on.)

Growing up, I was filled with anger and hatred toward my stepfather. It engulfed me and literally it was killing me; I was becoming a horrible person, a bitter person. I was taught to forgive, but I did not see how it could benefit me and I did not think that my step dad deserved it. I learned that the bible says, “if we cannot forgive others, how do we expect our Father in heaven to forgive us?” I thought that was completely unfair! How can I forgive such an evil man? I believed by forgiving him, it would allow the person who offended me to have an excuse to continue to act the way that they were, and it would make me look weak. Plus, why did he deserve forgiveness? Later, I learn forgiveness, is more for my healing than his and it is also a commandment from God.

The bible tells us to walk in love, (love covers a multitude of sins) and forgiveness and it gives us the keys to do so. First, we must recognize that we cannot do this on our own strength, we need to let the Holy Spirit move in our lives. As he moves in us, we need to confess that we forgive those who have hurt or offended us. When we do this, we do not always feel it. It is a process, and at many times, it is a step of faith. We have to remember, forgiveness is not only a choice, but if we want to walk with God the way he designed us, we must learn to forgive.

If we think about how many times we have broken God’s heart, rebelled, and walked away. We must realize that we too, are not entitled to forgiveness, but God gave this to us despite of our sins and what we have done in our past. He sent His only son to us, so we can walk, talk, and live with him forever. Plus, if we are true Christians and we want to follow the example of Christ, then we must forgive, like Jesus forgave us.

Through forgiveness, it gave me  the power to be set free from all of the wounds, pain, and bitterness. As I learned how to forgive, I eventually became a softer person and my heart was made new. No longer was I living as a victim, but rather I live in freedom and love. The bible says, “where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is liberty.” By allowing the Holy Spirit to move in my life and help me to forgive, I no longer live as a victim, but as an overcomer. Remember, the bible also says the He sent us the Holy Spirit to be our comforter, counselor, and healer. That He truly is. God’s word is what brings healing and restoration, we, need to allow Him to work and move in our lives.